How did life become so serious? Hmmm well I’d say just now.
I am not saying this to complain, I simply want to ask it to the world and leave my questioning to hit someone with a giant question mark. (?)
I thought that I didn’t seem to miss high school that much when I became a college student until recently. College provided less restrictions and regulations in terms of self-expression, values and faith. Freedom on one hand is not alone, it comes with great responsibilities. When I was granted with more freedom my responsibilities became greater as well. It multiplied twice, thrice and higher. Graduation came along; I became an adult granted with greater freedom and definitely with greater responsibilities. The only more serious thing about responsibility is actually being responsible. To have so many choices and options and still decide to choose the right thing, the valued decision, the moral, the upright. Then suddenly freedom became a serious matter.
Little by little I reminisced my high school days. Maybe because I miss my friends. My friends and I used to make beautiful music together. We have this group formed and from there I met some of my life-long friends. I never was a part of the honor section except during my freshman year in high school. I never made it to the cut off. I was in to studying but not so much with the competition; even if I was not in the honor section, I didn’t neglect my lessons I was often the topnotcher of my section, if not among the top 3; the class president, members of so many clubs and school organizations, English club, R.V.E club, liturgical choir, lector’s guild, youth ministry, rondalla, girl scout you name it most likely I am a member. I graduated not with academic honors but with so many medals in my extra-curricular activities, it rounded to about 18 all in all if I remember it correctly.
I usually come home late from meetings or choir practices. I remember just having fun, just simply fun. When I come home, I’ll have dinner, do my assignment, some light reading of lessons but what I really get excited about is the extra-curricular activities after class hours and one activity in particular, singing. No matter how tired I was the entire day, choir practices relaxed me; calmed me. In fact during my senior year, I often got scolded for compromising my UPCAT exam review to attend choir practices during weekends, forgive my audacity but no regrets for some magical twist of fate I got in not immediately but after a year. Of course not by mere magic, I compensated my lack of diligence in studying with prayer. I sing in my prayer. Thank God he heard me and did not abandon me. With the help of my one whole year in Miriam College, it was God’s way of sending a message to me that is, “I hear you.” In Miriam I got myself into being a member of the liturgical choir as well. In masses I sang and while I sang I still prayed. I never prayed any harder in my life. Hence the singing wasn’t as light as it used to be. This time I compensated my praying while singing with studying. I could not transfer unless my credentials are above average. There is now the turning of the tide.
I cannot remember having the same kind of fun I had in high school when I got in to college. This is not to say I didn’t have fun, life in UP is still the best years of my life. There, I discovered myself, my identity. There I also met the love of my life. I also got to sing with my beloved Likasyan friends during graduation. It was on the other hand different. I couldn’t be as careless and blissful during my teenage years. I always took summer classes to compensate for the minor subjects I took for Political Science. Even though I had more time in college I usually find myself seriously studying not simply by choice but by the circumstances of the situation. Reading about history, politics, and current news and constantly practicing my Spanish. I didn’t realize that I have become more likely a serious person.
I no longer get to sing, and now I miss it I really do. There is one thing I am thankful for though I don’t get to sing anymore. That is the memory of having done it. Yes, the joy of singing, not only as a personal form of leisure or self expression but also for God and most especially having done it with my friends, part of the notes that composes the music in my life.
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